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Posts Tagged ‘Humor’
Attack of the (blood-sucking) Congressional Leeches!
Thursday, January 19th, 2012Rick Perry member of Bilderberg group
Saturday, January 14th, 2012The secret list of members of the Bilderberg Group contains the name of Republican presidential Candidate Rick Perry of Texas.
If things go the way they have, it does not look like he will join Bill Clinton or Gerald Ford on the list.
Conspicuously, or perhaps surprisingly, absent from the list is Barrack Obama. It is apparent that you have to be a natural born citizen to be on the list or the group is racist.
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Tea Party Terrorist kill United Nations Peacekeepers During Winter Holiday Festival
Monday, December 26th, 2011Posted on December 25, 2011
by Glen C. Davis
Pennsylvania Bureau
TRENTON, N.J.—Official loyalist sources released news, today, that United Nations Peacekeepers stationed in Trenton, New Jersey were slaughtered in an attack by Tea Party terrorists who apparently crossed the Delaware river by night. Early reports indicate 22 of the Peacekeepers were killed and 98 wounded. The brave Colonel Johann Rall may have been wounded in the attack. It is said that the terrorist group was led by George Washington who calls himself a “General.” The Federal Emergency Management Agency has warned local constables against this wanted terrorist, as well as Thomas Jefferson and Paul Revere.
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We wish you a Merry CHRISTmas or a Happy Hanukkah.
Wednesday, December 21st, 2011Whether you celebrate CHRISTmas or Hanukkah, we wish you the best during this season.
You might recall our previous Christmas offering, The Flight Before Christmas.
In the spirit of the season, we offer you another CHRISTmas carol to sing to the tune of Santa Clause is Coming to Town.
You better watch out
You better not cry
Better not pout
I’m telling you no way
Cause the feds ‘ill send you to Gitmo Bay
Holder’s making a list
And checking the same;
Gonna find out who wrote about fast and furious
and mentioned his name.
Then he’ll send ‘em to Gitmo Bay
They see you when you’re sleeping
They know when you’re awake
They know if you’ve protested Obamacare
So they’ll put you on a plane!
(Without TSA fondling!)
O! You better watch out!
You better not cry
Better not pout
I’m telling you no way
Cause the feds will send you to Gitmo Bay
Cause the feds will send you to Gitmo Bay
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From the e-mail: Groundhog Day
Tuesday, December 13th, 2011Don’t bother checking it with SNOOPES. You know its true.
In the coming New Year, 2012, both Groundhog Day and the State of the Union address will occur on the same day.
This is an ironic juxtaposition of events.
One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to an insignificant creature of little intelligence for prognostication.
The other involves a groundhog.
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Arizona – Paul Shanklin
Wednesday, October 5th, 2011Cacoethes Scribendi
Wednesday, July 27th, 2011If all the trees in all the woods were men;
And each and every blade of grass a pen;
If every leaf on every shrub and tree
Turned to a sheet of foolscap; every sea
Were changed to ink, and all earth’s living tribes
Had nothing else to do but act as scribes,
And for ten thousand ages, day and night,
The human race should write, and write, and write,
Till all the pens and paper were used up,
And the huge inkstand was an empty cup,
Still would the scribblers clustered round its brink
Call for more pens, more paper, and more ink.
—Oliver Wendell Holmes
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For all our founding fathers…
Sunday, June 19th, 2011During this time that we celebrate Honor America Days, we pause to honor our Fathers, as well. We wish all Fathers the best on this day.
In honor of this day, we give you this story of Fatherhood…
(Warning: May offend some)
Continue reading “For all our founding fathers…” »
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Chinese take a lesson from US Government: Use Hollywood.
Friday, May 27th, 2011January/February 2011—Well, it seems that there is one thing we have found that China cannot manufacture. A movie with a good dogfight scene. China State run television ran a story concerning their air force firing a weapon and blowing up a Top Gun prop.
The Wall Street Journal ran a video showing the scenes from the news report and movie side-by-side. CCTV did not comment on the video but removed it from its web site.
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From the email…
Wednesday, May 25th, 2011Dear Boss,
I have enjoyed working here these past several years. You have paid me very well, given me benefits beyond belief. I have 3-4 months off per year and a pension plan that will pay my salary till the day I die and a health plan that most people can only dream about. I plan to take the next 12-18 months to find a new position. During this time I will show up for work when it is convenient. In addition I fully expect to draw my full salary and all the other perks associated with my current job. Oh yeah, if my search for this new job proves fruitless, I will be back with no loss in pay or status. Before you say anything, remember that you have no choice in the matter. I can and will do this.
Sincerely,
Every Senator or Congressman in the USA running for President.
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There’s something about Clovis, N.M.
Monday, May 16th, 2011
Springtime global warming hits northern Arizona.
Saturday, April 9th, 2011
Here's what "global warming" looks like in Arizona, McCain.
Northern Arizona experienced about another seven inches of global warming yesterday and today. The winter storm comes as temperatures were starting to rise. The storm caused a three-vehicle accident on I-40 between Flagstaff and Williams, Arizona. The National Weather Service web site shows a warming trend for next week.
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Man in mask steals Euros while the real Obama steals dollas.
Friday, April 1st, 2011
One would hope to come up with a great April Fools joke for today, but we didn't have to. We just added to this.
Upper Austrian police have arrested a man who is suspected of robbing more than half a dozen banks wearing a Barack Obama mask.
It was discovered that it was a man in a mask when police questioned the staff of the White House and found that all saw Obama in the White House stealing U.S. dollars during the times of the crimes in Austria.
Police officers caught the suspect hiding in woodlands in Vöcklabruck district after a bank robbery in the small town of Fornach yesterday afternoon (Thurs). The man, who is in custody, is accused of being behind yesterday’s robbery and six more bank heists in the region in the past two years.
Around 80,000 Euros were stolen in the incidents overall by a man sporting a plastic carnival mask depicting US President Barack Obama.
The robber had hoped to get away and no change was found.
Officials announced today that the man who was arrested yesterday is a German citizen. It is not clear yet whether he is responsible for all Obama mask robberies.
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